I got into a little trouble with the law recently, so I combined my engineering skills with my unhealthy cola addiction to build this space station out of old Coke cans. Pretty sweet, huh? It’s the perfect place for me and Kuiper to hide from the space police! to hang out!
On an unrelated note, if you happen to gaze at the stars and notice a large, can-like object in orbit, don’t mention it to the cops.
R.I.P. letter jeigh
- kuiper: hey, guys. I've been a little depressed recently. letter jeigh's been gone all night, so it's probably safe to assume he's dead. to pay my respects to him, i've decided to finish off his diet coke stash on his behalf. (woo-hoo!) also, i'll be auctioning off his stuff later today so please return to the blog later to-
- jeigh: Kuiper! I'm home!
- kuiper: oh, hey jeigh. i was just reassuring the nice citizens of the internet that you were okay.
- jeigh: That's nice to know, but i have even better news! I did something that unarguably proves that all this isn't just an April Fool's prank!
- kuiper: really? because i think that the fact that it's april 2nd and we're still around is proof enough that we exist.
- jeigh: Oh. Then I guess I blew up that planet for nothing then.
- kuiper: YOU WHAT?!?!
- jeigh: Don't worry, the planet I blew up hadn't been discovered yet, and nobody saw me do it, so we should be perfectly-
- space police: LETTER JEIGH, THIS IS THE SPACE POLICE! PLEASE COME OUT WITH YOUR TENTACLES UP!
- jeigh: Wha?
- space police: YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR THE DESTRUCTION OF A PLANET!
- kuiper: how did you find out?
- space police: WE READ YOUR BLOG. NOW THAT WE THINK OF IT, SINCE YOU'RE THE CONVICT'S PET, THAT MAKES YOU AN ACCESSORY TO THE CRIME. LETTER JEIGH AND ICE CREATURE, COME OUT OF THE BUILDING OR WE WILL BE FORCED TO USE DRASTIC MEASURES!
- kuiper: well, we're screwed.
- letter jeigh: Don't worry, I have a plan. I'll hang a rope out the back window to make look like we've escaped, then we'll hide out in my Diet Coke stash.
- kuiper: (woo-hoo!)
Why I Love/Hate April Fools Day
- Letter Jeigh: So, Kuiper, how does it feel to be on the interwebs?
- Kuiper: pretty unnerving actually. for some reason, all of the websites are undergoing massive revamps and gimmicks.
- Letter Jeigh: Yeah, in retrospect, I couldn't have picked a worse time to introduce you to the net. Today's April Fool's Day.
- Kuiper: i'm roughly 0.2 years old. explain.
- Letter Jeigh: April 1st was originally the start of the new year, but one day, they moved it to January. People who didn't get the memo and celebrated it on the original date were referred to as "April Fools," hence the title. It has evolved over the years into an excuse for websites to troll like crazy. Some of the pranks are kinda fun, especially the ones on Google and YouTube, but they can also be kinda obnoxious. Particularly when a site/comic/show switches into Bizarro-World-mode. You know it's probably a prank, but 0H G0D WHAT iF iT WASN'T?!
- Kuiper: you mean like when you see a trailer for something that makes you say to yourself, "there's no way that this could be real. nobody's that stupid," but it turns out that there IS somebody that stupid?
- Letter Jeigh: Exactly. You don't know what's real or fake anymore. Just like that Powerpuff Girls anime, which apparently exists outside of fanart.
- Kuiper: so when the bbc said the the earth blew up, did they mean it?
- Letter Jeigh: Probably not. We're still alive, aren't we?
- Kuiper: but what if the exploding planet story is true, and WE'RE just a prank?
- Letter Jeigh: I... I never really though about that. What if the whole world is just an April Fools hoax by some quasi-omnipotent entity?
- Kuiper: and by tomorrow the prank will be over and all this will be gone?
- Letter Jeigh: Wow. Really makes you think.
- Kuiper: wish there was some way prove whether or not this was all a prank.
- Letter Jeigh: iDEA!
- Kuiper: jeigh, what are you planning on?
- Letter Jeigh:
- Kuiper: oh dear, he's gone off to do something stupid. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY ENTIRE CONCEPT OF APRIL FOOL'S DAY! well, i'd better get to the bunker.
Kuiper Has a Blog Too!
Remember my little ice monster, Kuiper? Well, the other day I was showing him how to use the internet, and he was so interested that he decided to start his own blog!
No, seriously, he has his own blog!
This isn’t another April Fools troll, I really let Kuiper use my Tumblr account to to start a blog of his own.
If you still don’t believe me, check it out.
Remember that delightfully deranged drawing of a relatively obscure videogame character bursting through the scalp of sentient pottery? Well, I colorized it. Why? Because when the master of whimsy himself, Musho Rodney Alan Greenblat of PaRappa the Rapper fame, sent me this:
When the cartoonist who helped define an entire genre of video games likes your drawings, that’s a good sign.
I’d also like to point out that I have blurred out my name in the above email to protect my identity.
Seriously, if anybody found out my real name, I would be forced to break into their house and flick their ear mercilessly.
Unless that person happened to be Rodney Greenblat. That guy’s awesome.
Well, Spring finally has come upon us, and I have finally awoken from cryogenic stasis, so I figured that I should acknowledge this event with the most beautiful image I could think of: General Potter giving violent head-birth to Sunny Funny. (Think about it. he’s a flowerpot, she’s a flower. Do the math.) Told ya I’d make another one of these PaRappa things.
My “magic paperweight” turned out to be an egg! (Ice monsters reproduce asexually, who knew?) Unlike Furosty, this ice monster has a higher tolerance to heat, so I can keep it around the house without the fear of it dying in the most horrible way possible! Hooray! I think I’ll call him/her/it Kuiper.
(P.S. This was supposed to be posted later, but I made a typo when typing the publishing date. The queueing posts is risky business!)
My personal thoughts on love
Here’s a Valentine’s Day message from Letter Jeigh!
That was a Valentine’s Day message from Letter Jeigh!
I finally found that picture of Furosty I mentioned! Turns out it was at the bottom of his litter box. Other than smelling like yellow snow and frozen bologna, it’s still in perfect condition!
